Friday, October 21, 2011

Lifes Scoreboard

I been on the go since July 13th.

Last week my  body gave up on me.

Today fate has dealt me a terrible hand. Its like I am playing black jack I went all in and theN busted. For those of you who don't know what that means I went over 21. (Thank you mom and dad for teaching me to gamble)

One thing after another has been happening. Last week it was my back and a cold. I got a nasty cold monday but some how was feeling amazing today. I was excited got off work did some major cleaning and was getting caught up on Katie chores finally. When on my last little chore before going home to load the car, I slid right into a car. I wasn't hurt. He didn't seem hurt with all of his laughing and joking. (thats a different head ache) My poor trusty car is injured and is not legal to drive without lights :( This puts my traveling on a hold. Which is a heart ache to me. To you readers this may seem like no big deal. But too me this is pretty devasting. I had people counting on me this weekend. I had taken time off of work so I could be at places. I like being there for people. On top of it there is stuff that was suppose to get done two weeks ago and other things got in the way. Its another set back. Irritating and frustating.

Tolday I officaly admitted that I am emotionally beaten. I have taken enough from life these last few months that I am ready to run away to an beach and sit and stare at the beach with no thoughts. Just stare and imagine whats past that ocea that seems to go on for years. I am broken. Its not even just this stupid bender fender. Something minor of course has to turn into bigger problems for me. This is how God tests me lately. Its like he wants to see how much I can take. Everyone keeps telling me to slow down. Well here you go this is me slowing down now. Not by choice.

And if you were counting on me this weekend I apologize I wish I could be doing everything that I had planned.

Super bummed I will miss another weekend with Kenzie. She really is good for my soul. The drive seems like nothing once your in that room with her. My soul could of used some of that lovely soul of hers. I guess Randy and Soni will have to give her extra hugs and lovings for me! Love you guys!!

Next month I will look at this blog and this day will feel like a little bump. I know that. I will get over this and move on. I know how to do that.

Somedays those bumps seem like steep hills to climb. Today is one of those days. That or I am just sick of the bumps.



Time to get my hiking boots on!

Life 1 Katie 0

by the way I promise I am not cutting myself or anything extreme :)

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