stranger

Yesterday was the first day in a long time that I cried, like really cried. I got in my head and couldn't seem to escape the dumb questions I know not to ask myself. How did I get here? Why did I get here?

Three years ago if you would of told me that my heart would be so devoted to brain injuries. I would of laughed and said "brain injuries"? I would of called you crazy. To this day I am not sure why. I think its been a cooping mechanism to deal with the pain.

Yesterday I felt overwhelmed, lost, scared...I felt like I did July 13th. Why 13th? That was the first day I saw Kenzie in the ICU.

So I got out my book of letters that some very kind people wrote about me. I read the one my parents wrote twice and cried like a baby. Sometimes I read the letters and feel like I have never met the person that these people write about. I reread the article in the gazette. Watched the videos online again.

Some days, I feel like I am still in a dream and that I am going to wake up and be 24 again. But in reality I know that's not possible. I couldn't of been asleep for almost 2 years.

It's just one of those weeks were the heart hurts more than normal.